I've read accounts of women having very painful sex just a couple weeks after giving birth vaginally because their "sweet husband just couldn't wait". Most of the accounts I was encountering were about husbands who were definitely in the wrong. I (F) judged men harshly when I'd read stories by women of their husbands complaining about not getting enough sex. In reality, that situation has real life consequences for those women and I'm glad I'm still seeing the reality check about porn being talked about. There's a lot of jokes out there about naïve women with daddy issues who got their sex ed from porn or their first boyfriend being *perfect* partners - because they'll let someone do anything to them. I don't have to be everything for my partner. It's taken me a long time to realize it's ok if I'm not into some sexual acts. It contributed to me, several years later, attempting to be the "pornstar girlfriend" which was great sexually for the first guy I hooked up with, but then not so much because we did things I wasn't actually comfortable with and it strained our relationship (he actually did want a long term relationship with me). All of a sudden, I'm seeing a man with a giant penis choking a woman with it and then jizzing all over her face while calling her a slut. Up until then, all my info on sex came from the brief moments in PG-13 movies I wasn't supposed to watch where two people who had built up a relationship over the movie kissed passionately and then cuddled in bed. It was the front page of PornHub, so you can imagine. It did NOT look appealing in the slightest. The first time I (F) watched porn, I was 18. Those that really don’t have a CLUE about what is supposed to happen So basically what I’m asking just because im so curious and honestly genuinely concerned, those who waited til marriage/were so sheltered that you didn’t even really know how sex worked, what was that wedding night like? Good? Bad? Awkward? Even possible? What were you told would happen? Did someone like sit you down that day (especially girls) and tell you what was supposed to happen? Or did were you really just expected to flounder and figure it out? I just picture my poor classmates feeling so upset and uncomfortable after that first night and it just genuinely makes me so sadĮdit: to clarify, I’m wondering specifically about those who have never/barely seen porn and never really got a comprehensive sex talk. Is it not just the most traumatic awkward experience ever? In the past 3 years at basically every Mormon wedding reception I have been to I just can’t help be see these incredibly sheltered and very young (I’m only 22 so im creeping towards old maid status in my area) going off to attempt to have sex for the first time and I just can’t even fathom what that would be like. So I actually was not raised Mormon, but I grew up in a very Mormon community and ever since all my friends and neighbors have grown up and started getting married, I have been literally getting physical anxiety wondering how the hell waiting until marriage even works in this day and age.
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